Goodbye, sunshine

My little taste of heaven left me wanting more. Unfortunately, more is evading me once again. Once again, I am left hanging, waiting to be consumed by my internal demons. I was such a fool for believing I finally found my home. I forgot that I was a wanderer, a nomad. Now I have to pay the price for breaking the world's balance. My happiness, my sweet little ball of sunshine, shall be taken away. My strength, my will, my very core, gone in a blink of an eye. I belong to darkness now. I curled up in a pathetic ball of loneliness and confusion, waiting for someone who I knew wouldn't come. I expected lots of tears, yet none would come. Maybe it's because I knew that I would be defeated from the very start. I was simply blinded by my sunshine. His radiance lifted me so high up that when he flickered off I fell hard. My vision blurred when I hit the ground face first. I tried to blink several times, reaching my hands out to you, but all I touched was thin air. I shivered and shut my eyes. Why can't I open my eyes? I was too frustrated then to notice that I had my eyes open all along. I was simply looking out into an endless night. There was no light, there was no him. I tried to sit up and found my limp body was aching everywhere. I was confused. I called out his name. Silence stretched on and on along with the darkness. I was alone. I stood up and wandered aimlessly. This felt oddly familiar. A nomad, that's was I was. I was meant to do this. I knew at that moment that I would never see my sunshine ever again. I did not cry, I did not blame him or anyone. I just felt numb. I closed my eyes one more time. The wind picked up speed and I shivered once more. When I opened my eyes to the same old darkness, I whispered to the roaring wind, "goodbye, sunshine."